i just made my gag reflex go away.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
