when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize