Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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