Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
