So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
