Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
So much rum. So many feels.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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