u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
But break dance skills will only take you so far
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
