that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
