just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
