i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
i now understand why vodka
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
