Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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