I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
barbara walters just said penis...
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
don't judge my taste in strippers
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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