so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
