State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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