I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
