But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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