Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
