If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I need to wash the frat house off of me
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
