"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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