Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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