i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
We got so high we made milksteak
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize