Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize