I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
