just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
