I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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