batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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