Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Come on in and take your pants off
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