I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
