U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize