Soap is not a condiment
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
