omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Randomize
