did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
