come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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