giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
