But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
