operation harelip BJ is a go
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Randomize
