Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
