If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
