No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
