I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
