And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
