the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
