Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
