Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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