..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Randomize
