Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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