The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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