She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
