it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
She bit a glass in half.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Randomize
