will power is for people who don't want to get laid
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize