In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Randomize
